A Moment in Time

Among the highs and lows contained within everyday of this journey, once in a while a high comes along that can really take me away.  It gives me cause to be stronger and more patient, more forceful and quiet.  Seeing Miki hug the ground with her fingers while laying on her blanket in the back yard, watching her climb the ladder to her tree house, and the grin on her face that reveals itself at the top are a few examples. 

Today, while helping her up from her hospital bed, I was blindsided by another.  A flashback to May 29, 1982.  When she gets up from her bed to use the bathroom, she rolls onto her side first before sitting up and then she takes my hands and slowly but surely pulls herself to her feet.  She stands there for a minute to get her bearings and adjusts to her weight on both feet.  At that moment this morning, we were facing one another inches apart, holding hands, and I flashed to our wedding vows 31 and a half years ago.  For a moment, I was there all over again, looking into her eyes as she looked into mine.  She may have had a different experience than I did this morning, due to the pain meds that can place her on a different planet, but for me…those few seconds, I will not forget.  When her system clears out, I will share this with her in hopes of bringing a smile to the face that makes me smile.

Today was a busy day for Miki.  She was taken to get pictures taken in the many forms they come in for the doctors to see what is going on inside her.  Unwanted fluid was removed from her lung and multiple doctors dropped in to visit about their specialty, share what they knew, or gave options of things to do.  She is one tired girl.  Tomorrow she is having excess fluid drained from around her heart, since there has been an increase there as well.  All this and its not even what she came in for.  It’s like a spider web…everything is connected to everything else.  You can’t touch one fiber without it being felt elsewhere on the web.  Our hope is to get her patched up and delivered to MD Anderson, where a match made in heaven is being worked on as you read, between Miki and a doctor that will turn things around.  She is deserving and ready.

Okay, two postings in one day for me is unheard of and the dogs tummies are most likely growling (pun intended)…time to head home, feed the pups, and re-energize for another day. 

My Zen from Home:  What’s in a hug?  Some physical contact, some sentiment or feeling of some kind, and some time.  I’ll bet most hugs are lacking one or more of those three ingredients.  Hug someone and feel what is behind it while you do.  Like the visitors that visit the Grand Canyon, the majority of tourists just look over the edge.  Be the one that goes over the edge.  Wait, that didn’t sound right.  Be the one that goes into the canyon and is surrounded by it, rather than one that just looks into it.  Go hug a canyon!